Founder of NewBusinessMonitor
Programmer at Zimpler
My name is Jezen Thomas, and I am a software developer. I am originally from London, UK, though I currently live in Gdynia, Poland.
Since beginning my programming career in 2011, I have worked with clients in Sweden, Germany, Poland, The United Kingdom, and The United States. I have written sites and applications for several multinational companies in car manufacturing, marine navigation, security, fashion, sports, design, and finance.
Elsewhere, I share sarcastic quips about computers being perpetually broken on Twitter, and a photographic highlight reel of my adventures on Instagram. If you want to get in touch with me, email is best.
I have written for a few technical journals, and I am lucky enough to have been cited and interviewed a couple of times. To see me speak on stage, visit my speaking page.
- Stop Writing Loops And Start Thinking With Maps on Sitepoint
- A Guide To A Secure Life Online on the Telerik Developer Network
- Simplicity Master on the Developer on Fire podcast
- Programming Is Opportunity in Prestiz Magazine (Polish)
- Where Are The Employment Opportunities For Female Programmers? on Business.com
- Work Jul ’16 Presented a talk about building web applications with Haskell at Build Stuff conference in Odessa, Ukraine.
- Life Jun ’16 Bought a 2006 Porsche 911 Carrera S Cabriolet. Feels good man.
- Life May ’16 Bought a 1997 Polish Fiat 126 with some spare cash I had in my pocket. Within 24 hours of buying it, I burned through the clutch and rendered the car immobile.
- Life May ’16 Joined Syft. First official leadership position.
- Work Oct ’15 Presented a talk at Falsy Values in Warsaw, Poland. First time speaking at a major conference.
- Work Sep ’15 First time one of my articles hit the front page of Hacker News.
- Work Aug ’15 Joined UXPin, working full-time on a single-page application with React.js.
- Life Apr ’15 Attended the Precision Driving course at Porsche’s racing school in Leipzig, Germany. Moved to Gdynia, Poland.
- Life Dec ’14 Swapped my Porsche Boxster S for a 2004 Porsche Cayenne S, which I later came to regret.
- Work Jan ’14 Joined Vaamo Finanz AG: a FinTech startup in Frankfurt, Germany. First foray into functional programming with Scala, and first full-time remote job, working from home in Gothenburg, Sweden.
- Life Apr ’13 Flew to Berlin and bought a 2003 Porsche Boxster S.
- Work Aug ’12 Joined Rekyl Reklambyrå in Borås, Sweden. Used WordPress as a hammer for which everything looks like a nail. Sadly.
- Work Sep ’11 Joined Itiden for my first real programming job in Gothenburg, Sweden. Lived on the floor of a friend’s bedroom in a three-bedroom apartment that we shared with 10 other people.
- Work Jan ’11 Performed as a stilt-walker at the Qatar ExxonMobil Open and AFC Asian Cup sporting events in Doha, Qatar.
- Life Jun ’10 Bought my first car, a red 1990 Mazda MX5. Rusted and broken in parts, though it did drive. I drove it from Calais, France to Gothenburg, Sweden the day I bought it, with the roof down the entire time, which looked slightly absurd on the Autobahn at night.
- Work Jun ’10 Performed as a drumming robot on stilts at World Ducati Week in Misano Adriatico, Italy.
- Work Dec ’08 Joined a band and recorded an angsty teen rock album. Yes, really.
- Life Jun ’08 Travelled to Gothenburg, Sweden, for a holiday. Decided to stay for seven years.
- School Sep ’06 Moved to Newcastle upon Tyne, UK. Started studying music at Newcastle College.
- School Jun ’06 Finished high school. Total schools attended: 15. Total suspensions from school: 6.
- School Sep ’05 Awarded scholarship to study music in the weekend school at The Sage, Gateshead.
- Life Feb ’05 Moved to Darlington, UK. I wouldn’t recommend it.
- Life Feb ’04 Joined the 318 Squadron of the Australian Air Force Cadets. Co-piloted a Piper PA-38 Tomahawk aeroplane.
- Life ??? ’97 Moved to Sydney, Australia.
- Life Jun ’90 Born in London, UK, at Chase Farm Hospital. Mayhem ensues.